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[Using the flashlight from her phone, Daisy finally spots her key.]

Cool.

[Yeah, just keep playing it casual. It takes a few tries for Daisy to successfully get her key in the lock, and in all honesty she thought about just using her power to blast the door open.

One less thing to repair.

Speaking of repairs, there’s a giant hole in her ceiling. Which Bucky might notice when she finally turns the light on in the living room.]

I’m redecorating.

[More like someone fell through her ceiling. No biggie.]

I’ll go get that pizza, if you want to sit down.

[Maybe she should be the one sitting down considering how heavily she’s leaning against the wall.]

[He doesn't offer to help her with the door even when she's struggling, she's not a child and he's not about to baby her, he just waits patiently until they can both walk in. He's not been inside before, always electing to stay outside or leave when the invitation is given, but even so he's fairly sure the hole isn't something that's usually there.

Not that it surprises him.

He's seen the dents these animals and people make in the buildings, it makes sense that some of them would have fallen on residential spaces. She's still walking and talking, so she clearly wasn't crushed, that's what's important.]

Pretty sure you should let me get it.

[Given he's not about to fall over.]

Sit down.

No. You’re the hos-guest. You’re the guest, I’m the host.

[Maybe that last shot was a mistake...

Pushing off the wall, Daisy tosses her keys haphazardly in the direction of the table as she enters the kitchen.

What was she in here for? Oh, right, the pizza.]

Y’want it heated up?

I said sit down.

[It's a little sharper than before, but that's mostly because he really doesn't want to follow her around the house as she stumbles her way through trying to make him at home.]

I'm not here to be a guest, I'm here because you're drunk. So sit down, I'll get you the pizza and a glass of water, and then you go and sleep this off.

[Daisy is almost at the fridge when he demands that she sits down.]

Okay, jeeze.

[Daisy reaches behind her in the general direction for one of the dining room chairs. Hand finding purchase on the back of one of them, she pulls it out and—-

Her ass hits the ground, still gripping the chair that is now on its side next to her.]

[Really?

He watches her hit the ground with raised eyebrows, before coming over to offer her a hand.]

You really are drunk, huh?

[Daisy almost brushes him off when he offers her a hand up, but there’s no way she was getting off the floor otherwise.]

Bad day.

[And too many drinks.

Grabbing hold of his hand, she lets him help her up off the floor. Daisy holds onto him, waiting for the room to stop spinning.]

Do you—?

[That train of thought went out the window.]

Can I get that water?

Yeah.

[His grip on her hand is gentler than it needs to be, and he makes sure she's actually sat in the chair before he lets go of her.

He's silent as he fills her a glass of water, at least it's not hard to find things in the kitchen, and brings it back. But it's the second time she's mentioned her day, so-- perhaps she had wanted to talk about it?]

What happened?

[The question is quiet and mild, giving her as much chance as possible to refuse to answer if she doesn't want.]

[She misses this, misses him. Which makes it hard to let go of his hand when he pulls his away, but she does.

Leaning heavily into the chair, Daisy closes her eyes in both an attempt to reign in her emotions, and to also stop from feeling so whoozy.]

I couldn’t save them.

[Opening her eyes, Daisy looks up at him with tears in her eyes.]

I don’t know what—

My powers stopped working, and I couldn’t save them.

[He knows what that's like.

The first person that fell in front of him, he tried to catch in a futile attempt to save them. But a metal arm doesn't make a great landing area for someone already plummeting at a high speed.]

I'm sorry.

[That's genuine, at least.]

You saved one, I saw it. One is still a victory.

I could have saved more.

[She still doesn’t understand why her powers stopped working so suddenly, but if it could happen once it could easily happen again.

Without making eye contact with him again, Daisy takes the glass of water from him.]

I should’ve saved more.

You would have if you could.

[He's sure of that. The way this is hitting her is proof of it, even if she hadn't shown herself to be kind before now.]

That's all you can do. Try. It ain't your fault that it didn't work out this time.

[Biting the inside of her cheek to keep from crying, Daisy looks towards the ceiling as if that’ll keep the tears at bay.]

This place keeps punishing me.

[At least she was being productive with her grief/guilt back home.]

I deserve it.

Edited 2021-03-13 09:04 (UTC)

Now you're just being stupid.

[Sympathy dissipates a little in the face of such blatant self derision, and his tone is unamused to match.]

You're trying to help people, not your fault that it doesn't always work out.

[Daisy shakes her head. Not because she’s disagreeing that she’s stupid, but because he has no idea of all of the things she’s done back home.]

I’ve hurt people, Bucky.

[Daisy makes eye contact with him, knowing just how much he can relate to her experiences. She’s not sure how quickly she would’ve told him even this much if he still remembered her from before. She wasn’t the same person she used to be here. She wasn’t Skye.]

I can’t—-

I don’t think I can live with it.

[He knows what it's like to have hurt people, and to wonder if you ever deserved to have a life after taking so many others away. He doesn't know her exact story, and nor does he want to press and ask her about it now. She's clearly only being so voluble because she's drunk, and he doubts she'd thank him for pushing the issue and learning more after she sobered up.]

That's why you have to.

[His words are quiet now, and it's obvious he's talking about himself as well as her.]

You can't make amends if you're dead, can't pay back the debt owed.

[He's right, but she can't make herself see that. Not now.]

And what happens when I can't even save them?

[Like before.]

Then you make amends in different ways.

[He can't save the falling people, he found out the hard way just what a bad mixture a metal arm and someone falling at terminal velocity was, so he's trying to do other things.]

Nobody can save everybody.

[Biting the inside of her cheek, Daisy is silent for a long minute before taking a sip of her water.]

M’just a screw up.

[Daisy mutters to herself as she leans her head back on the chair.]

Maybe.

[He doesn't know her well enough to refute that claim, but nor is he going to condone it.]

But so is everyone, sometimes. You're not gonna be less of a screw up by drinking yourself into this kind of state.

[Closing her eyes, both in an attempt to keep from crying and because the room is spinning, Daisy does frown when he doesn’t disagree with her being a screw up. It’s good though, he’s being honest with her.

~~Even if it just makes her want to cry~~.]

S’not like I do this everyday. Sometimes I wish I could.

[He's really messing this up, isn't he? He can tell from the way her expression falls further, that he's sinking her deeper into drunken depression rather than alleviating it. The problem is that he doesn't know her well enough to know what would help, and he's hardly good at this sort of situation in the first place.]

But you don't, because you are needed doing things that aren't drinking. Even if you save one, and let five fall, that's one person breathing because of you. Seems to me that's worth it.

[Opening her eyes after a moment, Daisy tilts her head down just enough to be able to look at him. He's right, she knows he's right.

Of course, she still feels horribly guilty for what happened today and she very much wishes this water was vodka instead.

Even if the room is spinning and she should've probably cut herself over an hour ago.]

Thanks, Bucky.

[Letting out a sharp exhale, Daisy looks over towards her fridge.]

You still want that pizza?

[He shakes his head, relieved that he seems to have finally said the right thing.]

I think you oughta be in bed.

[He nods towards the glass in her hand.]

Finish that, then I'll go.

[Daisy doesn't want him to go, and she almost says it, but thank God she didn't. It would've just been one more awkward thing she'd have to deal with tomorrow.]

I could go for some pizza.

[Daisy mutters, loud enough for Bucky to probably hear.

Yes that was a hint. Since, you know, he wanted her to sit.]

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TW: suicidal thoughts

TW: suicidal thoughts

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CW: alcohol abuse mention

CW: alcohol abuse mention

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