IC Inbox

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This is the IC inbox for Bucky Barnes at Snowblind.

Network name: @bucky; formerly @j, @username, and @robertsmith

This is the place to contact Bucky over the Network. Contact by voice, text, or video is all perfectly acceptable, and there is no need to plot with me prior to posting in this inbox.

Any contact for @j following day 125, @username following day 190, or @robertsmith following day 224 will be met with the following message: USER NOT FOUND.

Comments

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[It's awful to see it put so starkly down like that, and there's no response for a long few moments.]

He could have got away if his leg wasn't injured.

[Does that tell how he's doing? Not good. He essentially contributed to another death, it feels like he murdered John.]

[mrcreamsicles]

see
you can talk to watson later and ask him how he feels
but ive argued with him over less and something tells me hes not gonna hold it against you
youre the one that fucked up his leg sure
but most people who do that on purpose wouldnt turn around and carry him for days to try make up for it

[advanced]

This isn't about blame.

[Shut up, he doesn't have a guilt complex.]

I lost a friend, I'm not interested in discussing guilt and blame.

[mrcreamsicles]

look im not gonna hassle you about this
ive hassled watson about stuff when he was alive but thats because hes dumb and stubborn and needs to take better care of himself
and also is a tiny english man and not dangerface mckillyhands
im just making my point here
and sympathizing because what happened fucking sucks

[advanced]

[How is it this kid, who he terrorised and who outed him to the town, is somehow making more sense than the other people he's with?]

Sympathise with him when he comes back.

[Bucky doesn't deserve it.]

And don't call me dangerface mckillyhands.

I love that icon, he looks like a pouty puppy in it

[mrcreamsicles]

sympathizing was penned into my schedule as soon as clint told me he was gone
would have made myself a neat magic note about it but the admin just had to go and take that from me
how am i supposed to write things now
ballpoints are for tools jay
everything is a step down after glowy orange sprite memos
and ill stop calling you dangerface mckillyhands if you take my sympathy
because guess what
you deserve it

[Remember what he said about not hassling? Yeah, he only meant about the guilt thing.]

that is his natural state of being

[advanced]

[What is happening here? How has Davesprite gone from thinking him a dangerous jerk who needs to be avoided, to bullying him about taking sympathy.]

You agreed to stay away from me. That means not contacting me to offer me sympathy for things you don't understand.

[mrcreamsicles]

bzzzzt wrong
i said i would stay away from you in person so i dont set you off
never said anything about not messaging you
plus you did the same thing to me the other day
hypocrite

[advanced]

It was necessary.

[He's getting frustrated now.]

I'm not someone you want to befriend.

[mrcreamsicles]

id say no shit sherlock except hes here too now
me sympathizing with you
and you sympathizing with me
are both things that are occurring or have occurred
it does not mean me befriending you is what is taking place
im the one who insists on calling you dangerface mckillyhands after all
which im still going to do until you give in and take this sympathy already

[advanced]

You don't sympathise with an enemy.

I wasn't sympathising with yoi, I told you a fact. You did the rightt hing, that's all.

[Please don't argue, he's so tired and it's showing through in his typing now. Typing with one hand is never easy at the best of times.]

[mrcreamsicles]

youre not an enemy
youre a dude who fucked up and knows he fucked up and is taking a bunch of steps to make up for those fuck ups and not repeat them
also youre wrong
because guess who also fucked up its me
lets not rehash that we already went through it once

[advanced]

[He is so very frustrated with everyone being so understanding. He doesn't want to be punished, per se, it just feels wrong to have people be so accepting of what he did. It's that stupid whisper at the back of his head, the paranoia that Natasha things is a product of MN poisoning, questioning why people are being so understanding. Is it to lull him into a false sense of security? Get his guard down?

There's a pause, but he's too tired to argue. He's hurting, emotionally and physically, and typing is getting so much harder. If Davesprite pushes it, he might switch to audio, but he's just going to try giving in, in the hopes that will work.]

Finethank you for thr sympathy.

[mrcreamsicles]

[He's dealt with assholes before, people who've done both worse and lesser hurts against him and the people he cares about and never said a single word of apology for it. People like Sherlock who act like manners are for other people, people like John who passive aggressively resented him for being the wrong Dave after he saved his life, and Jack Noir who killed everyone on his team at least once and three of their guardians without any concept of regret to his mind. He has this mess with Brian here, a guy who seemed to think him hurting Jade's feelings was ground for a creepy, near threatening message.]

[Bucky, by contrast, is a relief. He wouldn't say he likes him and he'd rather not be around him in person again until the guy learns how to chill, but the thing is Bucky knows what he is. Not everyone can come back from mistakes as big as he's made, accept and put them out there when called on it, when others have lied to cover him. Who the fuck carries around someone they've gravely injured on purpose to try and make up for it? It's huge. It tells him Bucky's trying, trying at something very hard, and he doesn't see any reason to be a dick about it.]

[He's not going to get rid of Davesprite easily.]

do you mean it

[It's why he says that, too.]

text -> audio;

[advanced]

[Well, clearly that didn't work.

He's not going to keep typing, he's noticed the mistakes he's made already and it bothers him, it's a display of his weaknesses in black and white. So he flicks to audio instead, voice low and carefully neutral.]

Why are you pushing this so hard?

audio;

[mrcreamsicles]

[Davesprite follows over, no fuss to it.]

Because, dude. I mean it and I'm not taking it back. You think I'd be throwing it out for no good reason when I'm the guy who told everyone what you did?

audio;

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Maybe, if you've been listening to the others.

[Which might actually make more sense, a thread of suspicion entering his voice.]

How much have they told you about me?

[mrcreamsicles]

[He pauses, thinking back a little.]

Honestly? Not much. They told me you didn't actually want to hurt people, but that was back before I outed you on the network. Either Clint or Nat was the one that let your name slip when I drew you to try to tell them what happened back then, and they said they were coming to get you, but obviously that didn't stop me. Watson lied to cover what you did before that thing with Charles, then later during that network fiasco he told me how you went and attacked him because of those movies from his world—which is super fucked up, by the way. Clint did tell me you'd been carrying Watson around after that, and the way his death went down, but that's not much after everything else. So if it was just what they said, I'd say fuck you and have done with it.

But you're the one who told me your deal after I was being a dick about it, who owned up to how dangerous you are and how bad you fucked up. You admitted what happened straight up to Charles. You even tried to apologize to me for everything. That takes balls, Jay.

So now you were trying to help Watson, going way above and beyond the call of duty, and he ends up dead. It sucks to have anyone die on you, but under those circumstances? Jesus. You get the sympathy because you deserve it. Just accept it.

[advanced]

[His only response for a moment or two is a shuddering and quiet exhale. He's only just holding it all together, and he really doesn't want to lose it down the line to a weird teenager who he barely knows.]

It doesn't matter.

[His voice is low and level, deliberately forcing calm.]

He was dead the moment I hamstrung him, he just took a while to die. It probably would have been kinder if I killed him outright to start with.

[mrcreamsicles]

[Davesprite falls quiet for a second, frowning over on his side of the exchange.]

You don't have to be a dick about it, Jay.

[But fine, whatever. It's Bucky's way of saying he's stubborn as shit and done with the argument, isn't it? Davesprite hangs up.]