For Tony Stark

[advanced]

[He's been on the run for what feels like decades, but is really only a few months. He knows he's doing a good job at being hidden because ever since the helicarriers fell out of the air there hasn't been a single confirmed sighting of him, and he knows that Steve is looking. Not just Steve, either. He's just not ready to be found yet.

The easiest way to move between countries, he's found, is by stowing away on private chartered flights. They're usually less attended than commercial flights, and if he can get on board then it's fairly easy to avoid the one or two passengers and crew. He has no idea that the flight he's stowed away on is Tony Stark's private jet, and that it's only Tony himself on board.

At least not until he hears a disembodied voice speaking throughout the plane once they're in the air. It's JARVIS, not that he has any idea who that is.]

Sir, scans of the plane show that there's a man crouching in your cargo hold. I wasn't aware you were transporting any men today.

Comments

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[He gives Barnes a long look, like he's weighing something, then quirks an amused smile. The glass he's been holding gets set down on the nearest flat surface as Tony slowly climbs to his feet and moves over to one of the nearby tables and snags a pen and paper. Sometimes it's better to have things that can't be hacked. And somehow, he suspects Barnes would prefer it.]

Here.

[He wanders back over, holding the strip of paper out to him.] Now don't flash that around or all the kids will want one.

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[He takes the piece of paper and folds it as if it's precious, before sliding it into one of his pockets.]

You're a weird man, Tony Stark.

[Is that a compliment, an insult, or just a fact?]

But thank you.

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I've heard worse.

[He shrugs and drops back into his seat, immediately reaching for his drink.]

So whatever shall we do for the next few hours?

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You know how to play cards?

[The question is asked in a complete deadpan, not giving away if he's joking or being serious.]

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[Tony shoots him an immensely dry look over the top of his glass.]

We are we talking here, poker? Rummy? Go fish?

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You're making that last one up.

[Poker and rummy he knows, though it's only really poker that he sort of remembers the rules for.]

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[There's the briefest pause before Tony lets out what can only be described as a cackle. He's almost instantly on his feet again to see if there's a deck around anywhere.]

Oh, now we're definitely playing. If you're good, I might even introduce you to War afterwards.

[Playing kid's card games with a notorious assassin. What even is his life.]

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[JARVIS very helpfully highlights the cupboard with a set of cards in, though otherwise he keeps his opinion to himself. Which is that his master is being a bit reckless this time-- and every time.]

Okay-- how the hell do you play Go Fish, then?

[Why can't they just go with poker?!]

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Okay you realize this is literally a game for children?

[He sounds entirely too gleeful about that as Tony wanders over to open the drawer and fetch the cards out. Still wrapped too, nice.]

I'm pretty sure you'll be able to keep up.

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I still think you're making it up.

[Oddly, this is the most relaxed he's been in-- well, since he can remember, and it's probably obvious. He's still sat like a man ready for an attack, but he's more engaged with watching the deck of cards rather than his surroundings and his accent is subtly shifting more towards Brooklyn.]

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Believe me, if I was making this up I'd come up with something a lot more interesting.

[He flops gracelessly back into his chair, absently shuffling the cards from one hand to the other, though he stops long enough to tug a small table into place mostly between them.]

So. [He grins a little as he deals out five cards to each of them.] It works like this. You want to get four of a kind. Pick a card, as me if I have any. If I do, I have to hand it over. If I don't, I tell you to go fish and you pick up a card from the deck. When you get your four, you put them down. Whoever clears out their hand first wins. Following?

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Sure.

[Those rules seem simple enough, and he doesn't have an issue with learning and remembering new things. It's all his past memories that have so many holes that they might as well be a type of swiss cheese.

He picks up his cards and flicks his eyes up to Tony.]

You allowed to lie in this game?

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You are not.

[He says it will all the gravity he can muster, shooting Barnes a very serious look over the top of his own cards.]

Do not sully this children's game with your falsehoods, Barnes.

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Seems like it would be more interesting if you could, but okay.

[He glances down at his own cards, struck for a moment at how bizarre this whole situation is.]

Got any fours?

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Let me remind you that this was your idea.

[And Tony makes a show of studying the cards held in front of him.]

Go fish.

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I can see why this is a kid's game.

[It's not exactly challenging. He reaches to the deck and picks out a new card, adding it to his hand.]

Got to say, I didn't see this being where my day was headed.

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I can still throw you out of the plane if you cheat.

[He doesn't really sound that concerned about it, though.]

Any queens?

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High stakes.

[The threat of death for cheating.]

If I had one, and I ain't saying that I do, do I have to give you them all or just one?

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Hey you were the one trying to jump earlier, clearly it's not that big of a deal. And just one.

[Tony peers at him suspiciously over the top of the cards.]

I'm not playing poker with you anyway. You have no facial expressions to speak of and I count cards.

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Okay, I got it.

[He looks down again as if to examine his cards intently, before looking up with an expression that might almost be called innocent on any other face.]

Go Fish.

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[That earns a deeply suspicious look, one that Tony holds even as he reaches to pick a card off the top of the deck.]

Maybe I should take you to Monte Carlo, now that I think about it.

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I've been to Monte Carlo.

[Well, the Soldier had been, and that sort of counts considering he's still a weird mix of the two inside his head.]

They didn't like me there then, doubt they'd like me much better now. Give me your twos.

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Who cares if they like it, it'd be funny.

[Honestly, Tony could still probably get him in. Maybe a little easier if he makes him get a haircut.

The demand gets a dry look, but Tony plucks the card out of his hand and holds it out to him anyway.]

[advanced]

[He takes the card and slides it into his deck in a way that manages to be totally smug without his expression ever changing.]

You really don't care about anything but your own fun, do you?

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Yep. All about the fun, me. Nothing else.

[There's heavy enough irony there to drag the whole plane down, but Tony just snorts a laugh.]

You get to go again, by the way.